I like the idea of an eyeball on a leash guiding the blind dogs around.

One time on a jobsite I was in a big dumpster full of broken marble and I fell into it when some marble shifted and I thought I was for real gonna die. I didn’t.

I feel like I should be able to burrow under my house and make a Minecraft style shelter. But I also remember one time I kept a couple Mastigoproctus giganteus and one burrowed under their water dish and the flimsy burrow collapsed on it and the water dish squished the vinegaroon. That would probably be me.

The victim (not the actual one but representative)

Honestly I don’t think anyone reads this but whatever. A coworker who was born after I started this site seemed baffled that someone would have a personal website. It is baffling indeed. Remain in the yard x or insta or fb or whatever sets out for ya. Lol like I don’t do precisely that.

Anyway just because you got shot doesn’t mean you’re not an asshole.

The days are getting longer here, although it’s still cold. I feel like I’m disconnected from the place I’m in though…I get in my car, I go to work, get back in the car, go home. Sometimes I stop at a grocery store. I don’t have any connection to this area, this region. I’m not from here. It’s upsetting.

It’s a little weird seeing the nuclear hysteria happening. I’ve spent my whole life aware of the fact that I could be blasted to dust at any moment, possibly because someone missed their meds, and it’s not really that impactful to me. By which I mean, there’s a walled-off part of my psyche that just screams endlessly. But it’s like a ringing in your ear; you go on with your day.

I distract myself with inanities and it works pretty well.

Take me to the river indeed.

Being so far from the ocean is rough, I hate not being next to that seemingly infinite blue absence of people. It was more of a release for me than I realized, just sitting by the sea being emptied by it. Here I have…a river? I guess. It seems like a muddy stream. Even the bigger rivers, they don’t do much. They lack vastness.

You should see the way it shits.

i completely neglected doing anything about this VPS account i had some clients on for like 3 years and now i’m getting my shit pushed in by it. note to self: don’t be a lazy fuckin idiot.

I hope tolek reads this from time to time, despite my long breaks between posting. I don’t have many friends and he’s one of the few. stay strong buddy.

happy to see my pals marie and chris having fun in the bay area. miss you guys.

Quarantined! Can’t sleep! Brain don’t work! Running out of money!

Is the world falling apart? Seems like it. Keep your shit together I guess. Hopefully those essential factory workers and truck drivers and pizza delivery guys don’t get sick, too.

At least we have steady, sober leadership in this time of crisis.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

I don’t want to check!

Last night I was driving uber and I picked up a guy named Siddartha. He was visiting a friend and seemed unhappy about it. Later that night, I picked him up. He was in a better mood, and stated “Man, I just needed some weed!”

I also picked up Erin from a gym. She asked if she could get personal and of course I said yes. She told me about her new boyfriend who was jealous of her male platonic best friend. I told her she was being honest, and trust was earned by exposure to hurt, and that if he can’t deal with that better now than later. She thanked me, and I dropped her off on a dark dirt road behind a fancy hotel that seemed really weird.

Jared was in an alley being hugged. I thought it was a hug of affection but it was a hug of desperation, he was near incomprehensible with pain. His friend I tried to gather was hurt badly somehow, and all her friends were gathered to help each other. “She saved my life man…” “Too much weight” he said pointing at his temple. “No questions, I’m sorry”

Seconds to minutes to hours homey. Hold fast.

So officially I went a year without an update. There’s posts I took down for various reasons.

Bizarre. Could this be the end of Babyfight? I guess not. Here I am posting.

Well, in the last few weeks I got a job, diverticulitis, and a girl baby. I saw her ultrasound-represented face a couple days ago. Early signs point to “cute baby”.

Being on antibiotics has kept me from drinking, and I’ve gone to bed earlier as a result. I’m interested in what will happen that first night I feel okay to have a beer again. I’m doing okay not drinking.

My kid came home from school for her 21st birthday party. Indicative of my recent life: I was hired, celebrated a birthday milestone, had a baby shower, and was hospitalized all in less than 20 days. Quite a run.

I’m enjoying a song by the band Deer Tick right now. Quite good.

The house renovation is slow since I basically have one day a week of skilled labor, the rest of the time is just me and Des. But it’s happening. This week is “no sink week” in the kitchen. I don’t think it’s as catchy as “Shark Week” but it may take off. Perhaps a viral video is in order.

I don’t take enough videos. I bet I could do something fun with them, and it’s good practice to keep my editing skills up to snuff. This week will also be “video week”. Sinkless video week.

Fringe is quite a good show. They manage to convey quite a complex set of motivations and emotions for characters, without a lot of the typical blank spots TV characters must have to make a season work. I’m sad it’s over. I guess there may be a movie?

I keep getting scratches and cuts at an amazing rate.

I’m kind of stunned right now. For a lot of reasons. I thought I had poisons in me but I guess I don’t. My head is spinning a little…I think I’ll just post some songs. Listen to them carefully, OK? They’re fucking good songs.

I am a breathing time machine.

I got a big big mouth that just won’t shut up!

I thought I knew, but I don’t know if I know.