Babyfight Dispensing goo since 1999


Only a year and about a third

Quarantined! Can't sleep! Brain don't work! Running out of money!

Is the world falling apart? Seems like it. Keep your shit together I guess. Hopefully those essential factory workers and truck drivers and pizza delivery guys don't get sick, too.

At least we have steady, sober leadership in this time of crisis.



I don’t even know when I last posted

I don't want to check!

Last night I was driving uber and I picked up a guy named Siddartha. He was visiting a friend and seemed unhappy about it. Later that night, I picked him up. He was in a better mood, and stated "Man, I just needed some weed!"

I also picked up Erin from a gym. She asked if she could get personal and of course I said yes. She told me about her new boyfriend who was jealous of her male platonic best friend. I told her she was being honest, and trust was earned by exposure to hurt, and that if he can't deal with that better now than later. She thanked me, and I dropped her off on a dark dirt road behind a fancy hotel that seemed really weird.

Jared was in an alley being hugged. I thought it was a hug of affection but it was a hug of desperation, he was near incomprehensible with pain. His friend I tried to gather was hurt badly somehow, and all her friends were gathered to help each other. "She saved my life man..." "Too much weight" he said pointing at his temple. "No questions, I'm sorry"

Seconds to minutes to hours homey. Hold fast.



So officially I went a year without an update. There's posts I took down for various reasons.

Bizarre. Could this be the end of Babyfight? I guess not. Here I am posting.


Holy fuck I’m slow on the updates

Well, in the last few weeks I got a job, diverticulitis, and a girl baby. I saw her ultrasound-represented face a couple days ago. Early signs point to "cute baby".

Being on antibiotics has kept me from drinking, and I've gone to bed earlier as a result. I'm interested in what will happen that first night I feel okay to have a beer again. I'm doing okay not drinking.

My kid came home from school for her 21st birthday party. Indicative of my recent life: I was hired, celebrated a birthday milestone, had a baby shower, and was hospitalized all in less than 20 days. Quite a run.

I'm enjoying a song by the band Deer Tick right now. Quite good.


Long weeks

The house renovation is slow since I basically have one day a week of skilled labor, the rest of the time is just me and Des. But it's happening. This week is "no sink week" in the kitchen. I don't think it's as catchy as "Shark Week" but it may take off. Perhaps a viral video is in order.

I don't take enough videos. I bet I could do something fun with them, and it's good practice to keep my editing skills up to snuff. This week will also be "video week". Sinkless video week.

Fringe is quite a good show. They manage to convey quite a complex set of motivations and emotions for characters, without a lot of the typical blank spots TV characters must have to make a season work. I'm sad it's over. I guess there may be a movie?

I keep getting scratches and cuts at an amazing rate.


Well now

I'm kind of stunned right now. For a lot of reasons. I thought I had poisons in me but I guess I don't. My head is spinning a little...I think I'll just post some songs. Listen to them carefully, OK? They're fucking good songs.

I am a breathing time machine.

I got a big big mouth that just won't shut up!

I thought I knew, but I don't know if I know.


Took a walk

I took a stroll around Kit Carson Park today. I hadn't been there in a while, and Ikoi and I powerwalked the length of it. It was good to get a tiny little sweat on, after my potato-like sitting about ways lately. I'd not seen the sculpture garden they built in there. I took a pic of Ikoi celebrating.


I also stopped by the pond and communed with the ducks for a while.


They did not seem to give a fuck. Ducks are like that.



For some reason…

...she still thinks that "I don't want to talk to you" means "I should talk to him". I'm so fully done with everything to do with her. I'm looking forward to things finalizing very much.

All that rubbish aside, Charles showed me some good bands, Trampled By Turtles and The Devil Makes Three, I added them into the hillbilly playlist.

That fiddler and the picker are on all the crack.

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If anyone’s curious

We're going to divorce. She got in touch with our facilitator and finally responded to something. So we should be on our way by the end of the week to a glorious dissolution of our 12 year relationship.

I'm going back and forth but primarily I'm feeling some relief. She had the same problems with me and her life the entire time we were together, and she never seemed to want to fix it. She caught me off-guard with this a couple months ago, and things fell apart pretty rapidly. As I told her, numerous times: if you're not happy, you owe it to yourself to move on. I tried everything I could to get her to come work things out with me, but in the end she couldn't do it.

I honestly hope she's happy someday, and finds whatever it is she's looking for. I refuse to regret my life with her...I did my damnedest to be a good man. I'm going to go forward continuing to try and be a good man, a good father, and look at the world, in the words of Ashitaka, "with eyes unclouded by hate".

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Such a time

Right now I feel so low.

I've got a lot of bad things happening. My job has disappeared, and I'm not sure how I'm going to make my mortgage payment. My kid's car is basically collapsing and I'm not sure how I'm going to pay her tuition to school. And my marriage is basically in complete collapse, with my understanding wife saying she may want to possibly at some ill-defined point in the future work things out.

Honestly, I'm not feeling all that great.

I thought it would be good to write about it here, since I haven't written here in a long time and no one reads it anyway, but it does. not. feel. good.

So fuck this

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